• You still refer to the NHL 2004-05 season lockout as “The Dark Ages”.
• You’ve daydreamed (on more than one occasion) Mission Impossible scenarios such as rappelling through the ceiling of Border Bar to uncover the secret amazing recipe of their pizza — their “zaa” recipe must be just as guarded as Bond’s secret microfilm.
• You (or someone you know) has had a three hour discussion with Big Vic following a stroll down Highway 11 after close-up at the Roadhouse.
• At some point, an issue of Outdoor Life has brought tears to your eyes.
• You know nothing is more attractive as a beautiful borderland woman in a hockey jersey.
• Unlike Sarah Palin, you can actually look towards the horizon and actually see a foreign country.
• Either you or someone in your family has taken the “triple-dog-dare” which got their tongue stuck to a metal pole near the old Lucca’s store – or elsewhere.
• You know that a “busy bee” can mean more than just a diligent employee.
• Anytime you see the purple, gold, and white on the Vikings uniforms, you shake your head while singing Marvin Gaye’s “Ain’t Nothing Like the Real Thing, Baby.”
• You’ve wondered why postcards aren’t included on the town’s listing of exports.
• The movies Grumpy Old Men and Miracle had a profound effect on you.
• Someone in your family has heard about the revered Judy Tilander-Rosten’s pancakes. If not, be sure look into it.
• Guys, at some point, you’ve tried to figure out countless times how to ask your partner to consider naming your firstborn “Nagurski.” Still haven’t solved how to bring that up to her yet.
• When you went to Beverly Hills on vacation and strolled down Rodeo Drive, you scoffed and said, “Ain’t got nothin’ on Shannon Square.”
• If you’ve smiled reading this and nodded your head at a few.
And finally:
• If you take absolute pride in being from the Ice Box of the Nation; a place where humor and heritage, freezing temps and family strength, unyielding hospitality, strong dreams and scenic sunsets, and indescribable memories still continue to be written.
About Robert Animikii Horton
Robert Animikii Horton was born in International Falls and is a band member of Rainy River First Nations. He is a sociologist, social activist, internationally recognized orator, writer and spoken-word poet. Horton is finishing his master’s degree in sociology from Lakehead University. This written piece is dedicated with love to his family (Hortons, Rostens, Hilfers, Medicines, and Tilanders) living in town.
